Psychology In Self Defense

(This part one of a two part post on self defense)

It is always best if you can avoid a fight if you can. However, sometimes it doesn't work out. Anytime you find your self in a realistic altercation, there are a few things that won't hurt to know. When teaching on this subject, most schools and instructors will delve right into the plethora of self defense techniques, paying no mind at all to the more important aspect of fighting for your life: your thought process. Knowing ten thousand self defense techniques is useless if you are not psychologically prepared for the situation. The biggest problem anyone has in a fight is our natural reaction to freeze up. This is especially true when we are crowded by our attacker. And it is a fact that most realistic attacks happen at very close range. Forget what you read in defense manuals where you see two people squaring off, face to face. Your attacker will likely come from behind or the sides and be less than a foot away. It doesn't matter how many moves you know or how many boards you can break, if you freeze up in this situation, you are in serious trouble. Therefor, the most important part of fighting for your life is to have the will and mental power to execute under pressure of physical violence. As they say in wilderness survival situations, "Don't panic". They same applies hear. Instead of letting fear control you, you use it as a tool to sharpen and heighten your senses. Let it come to you as a friend, a reminder that your life is on the line. It's impossible to completely rid yourself of fear in a fight. It would also be detrimental, for fear keeps us in check with our reality.

Your next hurtle to jump is the one concerning your attitude and intent toward your attacker. To put it in context, in a realistic altercation where you may be the victim of anything from murder to kidnapping or rape, there is no win or lose, only survival and the alternative. You must completely forget your preconceived notions of morality and dignity. You will have plenty of time to think on those things later. The only thing that should be in your mind at the moment of the altercation is how to enforce your will over that of your attacker. Nothing else matters. Should it even come down to killing your opponent, if your life is on the line, kill him. Also, have no hesitations about attacking first. It's called pre-imminent attack and it can save your life. I've seen schools teach their students to never attack first, always counter. They teach this as a facet of morality. Similar to the idea that the good sheriff in the old west waits for the evil gunman to draw first. Do you know what would happen to such sheriff's? They'd get shot.

The third step is understanding that it's all about self preservation. Finish an attacker only if you absolutely must to ensure your survival. If you can get away, you should. Many schools teach their students how to use finishing techniques once they have their opponent on the ground. This is very foolish. If your opponent hits the ground, keels over, or even takes his attention off you (if he is not within reach) then make a run for it. One of my favorite self defense illustrations for my students is a simulation where I have them role play and try to talk their way out of a fight with me. I act mad and push them, yelling for them to "just try and hit me!". If they play it smart and handle the situation properly, I let them walk away. If they act like a tough guy, I always do something that shocks them because they never once let this possibility cross their mind. I yell for three or four students to come help me beat this guy up. It completely shocks them. It's all safely simulated and I never actually let anyone in this particular drill actually touch anyone else. But the point is made and they never forget it. You never know the extent of your situation. Your opponent could have ten friends around the corner. He could have a knife in his pocket, or worse, a gun. Always get out if you can.

In the end, remember this one thing: it's about preserving your life. Forget anything else you have ever been told. It's not about honor, justice, morality, or anything else that was conceived by men who never really fought. At the end of the day, if you go home alive, you've done well.